Her mind wanders in the soot filled
dreams when she was eighteen and lost,
tried to commit suicide her first year in
college. Far from home with a homesick
roommate and people who ate this slimy
looking white stuff –grits–she’d never
heard of or seen. Crazy people who
thought black peoples’–they called them
colored–only use was playing loud
music to dance to. Who could adjust to
these southern belles riding horse to
hounds, dancing to music they couldn’t
touch with people they could never love.
In isolation she played piano for hours,
wrote depressing stories no one could read
and swallowed a bottle of bitter. Changed
her mind, vomited in the infirmary, made
volcanoes in chemistry class, flew around
Washington, D.C. during Kennedy’s
funeral to avoid her own.