Monday evening I attended a private reception at The Getty for photographs taken by teens to reflect their reactions to the pandemic and the shut downs. This first photo explains the exhibit.
Posters have been made from the teen photographs and will be available for purchase.
The Getty is astonishing. I was able to see only a tiny portion of it. Definitely a place to see if you come to Los Angeles.
I see you, the dead, the too often forgotten,
you who lost your lives to Covid,
1,000,000 gone.
This is like wiping out the entire population of
Columbus, Ohio,
wiping out all the people who live in
Montana.
More of you died than live in the entire
states of
Wyoming or
North Dakota or
South Dakota or
Alaska.
This is like wiping out 1/2 the people in
New Mexico.
Lest you who read this forget,
pretend all are dead in Columbus,
no one is left in Montana.
All dead.
Envision the magnitude of
our loss.
Grieve for them, their friends,
their families.
Do Not Forget.
I post these flowers in remembrance.
My Aunt Julia, Mom’s sister, lived to 94. She loved fine antique china, linens, and French furniture. The ordinary bowl in this photo defies those inclinations, its origins a mystery. How did she acquire such a plain bowl and why? I will never know. In spite of its age, cracks, dull finish, I have used it every morning for decades. It is my breakfast bowl, filled with yogurt or cottage cheese with dried blueberries and a handful of walnuts, or, occasionally, oatmeal.
The spoon, on the other hand, is not ordinary, but rather good silver from the set Dad gave Mom on their first wedding anniversary. Unlike Mom, who saved her good silver for holidays and special occasions, I use these spoons daily and think of her unconditional love, strong will, determination, and love for beauty.
Decades ago my parents, long deceased, started going to warm Arizona from cold Missouri. They gave me their artificial Douglas fir tree. It was the old fashioned kind of tree where you had to put together a column, add alphabetically labelled limbs one by one, then add the lights of your choice, and finally the rest of the decoration. Every year I unpacked it and went to work. This year was no different except a crucial part of it was missing. I still do not know whether moving was a factor or somehow I did not pack it up correctly. Regardless, it was obvious I would not be using it. What could I salvage? The limbs, the top so I used parts of it to decorate.
Then my daughter, Ema, told me I could use her tree which is too wide for her current place. We took it out of the box, she showed me how it works, and I decorated it this afternoon. It is wider and I had to move some furniture but I love the result. I have a tree, but still could salvage parts of the tree I have treasured for all these years since Mom and Dad gave it to me.
Now it is time to finish the shopping and wrap the gifts.
An “exercise” to write a poem about ones origins with the words I am from… inspired me to write this poem.
I am from the dark side of the moon, blood born, secretly shining.
Fuerte
I am from puma, stalking your memories, invading your minds,.
Fuerte
I am from Gottlieb, who left Swiss mountains 150 years ago at 18 to avoid
becoming a mercenary, moved to Missouri, created a farm. His cultivator
sets in my front garden.
Fuerte
I am from persons Gujarati, Bengali, Punjabi, who sailed seas, met strangers, loved.
Fuerte
I am from Esan, a Nigerian tribe about which I knew nothing until a DNA test revealed,
ancient, black, beautiful.
Fuerte
I am from Latin America, Colombian, Peruvian, Puerto Rican–wanderers, explorers.
Fuerte
I am from Slavic peoples. Byzantine, Macedonian, Alexander the Great.
Fuerte
I am from brave wandering ancestors–Asian, Latin, Toscani Italian, French, German, Swiss, Slavic, Iberian.
Fuerte
I am from J haploid group, people who left the northern Middle East 7000 years ago,
wandered, explored, populated Western Europe.
Fuerte
I am from farmers, Doyle and Barbara, who grew corn, wheat, soybeans, Hereford and Charolaise cattle
to whom I carried salt blocks as a child.
Fuerte
I am from Sacred Corn, the nourisher, singing on hot summers, growing.
Fuerte
I am from the sweet smell of Jasmine, Roses, Honeysuckle, winding up walls, overgrowing gardens,
giving people hope.
Fuerte
I am from lemons, figs, dates, pomegranates, golden, dark, red, tropical, lingering.
Fuerte
I am from Stars, universal child, born on sacred ground, singing infinite songs.
Fuerte
Mother’s rose garden
flowers for the family table
all my childhood summers.
Red, pinks, snowy.
No roses for decades
except those given, bouquets,
mostly red.
Now, I look out every window, roses
Pinks, reds, orange, lavender, yellow, snowy.
I love them, cut them,
And remember my mother.
Barbara Lewis Duke, pretty, petite, blue-eyed and blond, my
mother, one fearless, controlling woman. Long after Mom’s
death, Dad said, “Barbara was afraid of absolutely no one
and nothing.” They married late, 34 and 38. He adored her
unconditionally. She filled my life with horses, music, love,
cornfields, hayrides, ambition. Whatever she felt she
had missed, my sister and I were going to possess: books,
piano lessons, a college education. Her father, who died long
before I was born, loved fancy, fast horses. So did she. During
my preschool, croupy years, she quieted my hysterical night
coughing with stories of runaway horses pulling her in a wagon.
With less than one hundred pounds and lots of determination,
she stopped them, a tiny Barbie Doll flying across the Missouri
River Bottom, strong, willful, free.
This is my new book, published last month. Â It is filled with stories, poems, and recipes–healthy food for vegans, vegetarians, pescatarians, and meat eaters with photos and detailed instructions. Currently, it can be purchased at Burrowing Owl bookstores in Canyon and Amarillo, Texas, and online at http://www.dreamcatcherbooks.com, Angel editions.
The Nap
He lays on his back on the cold, hard, blue linoleum floor after
the midday dinner of homegrown roast beef, potatoes, wilted
lettuce salad, hot coffee, coconut topped cake. Â His left arm
forms a right angle at the elbow as the back of his wrist rests
on his forehead, touching the slight curliness of his not quite
black hair. Â His left leg stretched out straight, right one drawn
up, knee jutting out. Â The sleeves of his worn, pale blue dress
shirt rolled up; his overalls show signs of wear and washing.
Every day after dinner he naps in the same spot in this same
position for exactly fifteen minutes before returning to the field.
My father.
Seventeen years after his death, one day as I napped, slowly
driving off, astonishment stuck. Â There I lay exactly as my
father used to so many years ago, my left arm forming a right
angle, wrist on my forehead, left leg stretched out straight, right
one drawn up, knee jutting out. Â I remember not just in heart
and mind.
The body always knows.
Taken at the top of Mt. Evans in Colorado when I was a child.
Will many record their experiences during this difficult time? Â I have no idea. Â However, a thought came to me yesterday that I should–not sure why, just that this is something I should do. Â Interesting because I am not really into “shoulds.”
Because Martina, the exchange student who lived with me this time last year, lives n Milano, I have realized the seriousness of this for weeks. Â She and her family have been quarantined for so long that I have lost track of just how long. Â A couple of days ago her mother had to go to the grocery. Â It took her four hours to get through the line. Â She has a grandfather over 90; they worry about him; he is scared.
Yet, here in the Panhandle of Texas, many fail to realize just how awful this can get. Â Until yesterday, when they had no choice due to the statewide mandate, they went out to eat, exercised at the gym, congregated in mass at bars, you name it. Now schools are closed until April 3 when the situation will be re-evaluated.
In the last ten days the only places I have gone are the grocery, the doctor’s office–for an awful allergy attack. Â Luckily, I live out in the country, have horses. Â They have to be fed twice a day, their runs cleaned. Â Today it is 70, the patio doors are open; I might even take a little hike later. Â Just me and Athena, my black, standard poodle.
Luckily, it has been spring break so I have had plenty of time to think about what to do with myself as I keep myself quarantined–I am not even going to my daughter and grandson’s house–I really miss seeing them. Â What do I do: Â have read two books, almost finished crocheting a poncho, worked one warm day in the garden, graded all the papers I brought home and posted them, cared for the horses, cooked, communicated with friends worldwide–Covid19 is everywhere, watched some TV, mostly news and documentaries. Â One thing I will do every day is act as if I am actually going somewhere, put on my makeup, get dressed, have a plan for the day.
This morning I went to the grocery. Â What did I do when I returned home? Â I left the bag outside to air–will disinfect it shortly, I took off my clothes in the laundry room and put them to wash. Â Then I took a hot shower. Â Why all this you ask? Â The virus can stay in your clothes for 24 hours. Â There were more people in the store in the morning than I expected. Â Are they healthy, virus free? Â No idea. Â In the county where I live, there have been two cases already. Â I do not want to risk it. Â Although I am healthy, I am in one of the higher risk categories due to my age. Â I do not mind dying, but who wants to die from this? Â I don’t.
It is a nice spring day outside, the wild flowers are starting to bloom, and I need to relearn how to use Google Classroom because that is how I will be teaching English and Spanish until who knows exactly when. Â I have used it before over a year ago. Â I need to refresh myself.
Here are a few pictures of the wild flowers around my house. Â After this, review Google Classroom and maybe play the piano for a bit.
Take care of yourselves. Â Be safe. Be wise.
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